So I was rewarding myself after making it through this week because I had to submit an assignment and go through an interview with The New Paper for my internship which I think, didn't go as well as I had expected. I went out for a BBQ gathering with my Bottega ION colleagues on Friday at East Coast Park and had loads of fun. To think I almost didn't go down until KY agreed to wait for me. Anyway, I didn't eat a lot but I laughed so hard at times, I had tears in my eyes. It was a non-stop laughfest. Gorgeous! How 'bout it? HAH!
Then I treated myself to a TV series marathon, mainly Brothers & Sisters and Grey's Anatomy, and now I find myself here, in the dead of the night, trying to complete my assignment which is due Tuesday morning. But my mind is just whirling and noisy and I can't focus. I keep getting distracted by my shows, but it's not that I'm watching. I mean I've watched, but I can't keep the quotes out of my head because it's so freaking hilarious. By watching Brothers & Sisters, I've learned "lessons" which I now call Bryanisms, which I realise is plagiarising since they're not my ideas, but what the hell.
Bryanism #1: If you bake the cake, he'll come.
Kevin was mad at Nora and when she was making his birthday feast, Scotty -Kevin's husband- told her that he wasn't coming and she said that if he baked the cake, Kevin would come. And I thought it was kinda funny and I can totally imagine myself saying that to someone, so why not?
Bryanism #2: You have to care about the carrots. It's the carrots and onions and celery that ground us. Nothing is more basic than that when the whole world is shifting and changing; you got to hold on to your carrots.
Again, Sarah was telling Nora that Kevin wasn't coming and she got irritated that her mum didn't seem to understand that so she yelled at her to stop chopping the carrots 'cause it wasn't important. And Nora told her that she was wrong. And what she basically meant by that quote was that in the face of change, you have to be grounded. You have to hold your ground. Although it's a pretty serious lesson, you gotta admit, the analogy is hilarious. HOLD ON TO YOUR CARROTS PEOPLE!
Bryanism #3: If someone disapproves of you drinking when it's not even noon, just say that you're being European.
Nora walked into the kitchen and found Kevin and Sarah sipping champagne and she was shocked to see them drinking when it wasn't even noon. She expressed her concern and Kevrah (a nickname they coined for themselves when they played doubles for tennis in the past) said that they were "being European". I chuckled. And I realised that I'm gonna say that until the end of time. This is what I love about screenwriting. They always have some witty and insightful remarks which we're all gonna adopt for the rest of our lives.
So that's basically what I can't get out of my head. I keep thinking that at some point in the distant future, I'm gonna use those quotes on people and laugh. And while the prospect of that is, well, hilarious, I have serious work to do. And my mind still won't shut up. I thought the post would work, an outlet to channel my mental energies but it didn't 'cause writing about those quotes just made me even more... crazy, for lack of a better term. And now I'm telling myself, "Ok. You gotta stop 'cause you gotta hold on to your carrots and stop laughing!" And I think I'm making things worse, aren't I? Hah!
Monday, November 22, 2010
Monday, November 15, 2010
my own personal brand of heroine (part 1)
Extracts/quotes from EW recaps/TV shows that crack me up like mad. This will be an ongoing thing and whenever I find something worth quoting, I'll post it up.
EW Brothers & Sisters recap, Annie Barrett, Cheat Drink Man Woman
"You know Marcus was just begging to be involved in the drama and is probably still relishing his facial wounds in his vanity mirror...which is probably surrounded by a dotted line of those huge round bulbs, fit for a stahhhhhhh!"
"And for Scotty, this was like a wake-up call to the rest of the Walkers as well as the viewers at home: Scotty is not perfect. We should stop assuming he is, even though that will be so hard because LOOK AT THAT PERFECT FACE. But no. "I'm just as lost and damaged and screwed-up as the rest of you," Scotty insisted. Okay, if he says so."
EW Brothers & Sisters recap, Annie Barrett, Absinthe Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
"But the real drama presented itself in Luc's visiting mother, Gabriella Laurent (guest star Sonia Braga, who's appeared in many a TV drama, but best of all, hello, Alias!) Right off the bat, there were signs she was a complete narcissist loon and also -- now that I'm reading over her first few sentences on Luc and Sarah's doorstep -- a pathological liar. "Sometimes you miss your children so much you just cannot stay away from them." (Lie.) "My only desire was to come here to meet Sarah." (Lie.) "I went ahead and booked a hotel room." (Probably a lie.) "I would rather die before I distracted my genius son from his work." (LOL.) At least we knew we were in for a dazzling, emotionally draining treat, courtesy of a(n at least a) decade-old bottle of absinthe."
EW Gossip Girl recap, Sandra Gonzalez, War of the Worlds
"Before leaving to attend to Serena's ass his class, Colin issued a warning to Juliet: Back off or get cut off. Not that he was paying for her to live in the lap of luxury. Sure, Columbia doesn't come cheap, but wouldn't billionaire cousin at least give her some money to buy clothes that she didn't have to return? Sorry, I forgot this show is best watched with an absence of reason and logic. (That's not a complaint…)"
"Meanwhile, Serena and Colin's well-calculated cab rendezvous (still with no sex) turned into a conversation about a possible weekend away from the city together so they could get to know each other like a normal couple. Serena loved the idea, telling Colin, "I'm packing in my head already." Ah! So that's what fills that space…"
"At the loft, another arrangement was in the process of being made: one between Nate and Vanessa, both of whom had feelings of ill will toward Juliet. They wanted vengeance, so Nate proposed an alliance. He would distract Juliet if Vanessa went to Juliet's real apartment to look for information they could use. The decision was easy for Vanessa: "Let me see, writing a paper on Hannah Arendt or a secret mission that might help me clear my name? Let me grab my bag." (I'm a little shocked she didn't also bring along her broom and her cauldron.)"
EW Grey's Anatomy recap, Jennifer Armstrong, Heat Under Pressure
"Now, everything was coming to a head: Stark stole Alex’s idea to use a ping-pong ball to fix the liver problem (I’m dumbfounded that it would be okay to have a ping-pong ball lodged in your abdomen, but I’ll go with it), but April made sure the Chief knew it was Alex’s. The pancreas patient started to crash, and Bailey was busy, so she told Avery to “open her up.” And Derek, Meredith, Owen, and Teddy were squabbling over whether to give Cristina a talking-to that night — while, yes, they were performing simultaneous brain and heart surgeries that could determine the fate of the Middle East. I hope Cristina appreciated that."
EW Grey's Anatomy recap, Jennifer Armstrong, A Million Dollars, Baby
"At any rate, we, along with the eager doctors, were led to believe that one department would get this supposed million dollars. This meant the attendings would be spending their day proposing grand plans to the Chief, and the residents would be the attendings. In other words, it was not exactly the day you wanted to check into Seattle Grace. Here's something you don’t want to hear from the Chief of the hospital you are checking into: “Pray, people. We want God in the building today.” You also don’t want to come in with massive headaches due to a build-up of fluid in your skull that will require a shunt, only to be told by Dr. Derek Shepherd that you shouldn’t sweat the residents doing your surgery because, hey, “At some point we have to let them operate. That’s how we make new surgeons."
"Owen asked for disaster training. “We failed Charles Percy, one of our own doctors. I can’t face that.” I would love it if they ended up with some Charles Percy Memorial something — just to immortalize that poor, useless character forever. I feel like his name has come up more since he died than it did in the season he was on the show."
"Mark proposed a cosmetic medicine center and a burn unit, mainly because, um, he’s horny? “I’m not seeing anyone right now,” he told the Chief. “I’m not sleeping with nurses. So I’m an untapped source of raw power.” Only at this hospital is this a valid funding argument."
I had so much fun re-reading the recaps trying to fish out the hugely hilarious bits and I hope you guys have as much fun as I did!
EW Brothers & Sisters recap, Annie Barrett, Cheat Drink Man Woman
"You know Marcus was just begging to be involved in the drama and is probably still relishing his facial wounds in his vanity mirror...which is probably surrounded by a dotted line of those huge round bulbs, fit for a stahhhhhhh!"
"And for Scotty, this was like a wake-up call to the rest of the Walkers as well as the viewers at home: Scotty is not perfect. We should stop assuming he is, even though that will be so hard because LOOK AT THAT PERFECT FACE. But no. "I'm just as lost and damaged and screwed-up as the rest of you," Scotty insisted. Okay, if he says so."
EW Brothers & Sisters recap, Annie Barrett, Absinthe Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
"But the real drama presented itself in Luc's visiting mother, Gabriella Laurent (guest star Sonia Braga, who's appeared in many a TV drama, but best of all, hello, Alias!) Right off the bat, there were signs she was a complete narcissist loon and also -- now that I'm reading over her first few sentences on Luc and Sarah's doorstep -- a pathological liar. "Sometimes you miss your children so much you just cannot stay away from them." (Lie.) "My only desire was to come here to meet Sarah." (Lie.) "I went ahead and booked a hotel room." (Probably a lie.) "I would rather die before I distracted my genius son from his work." (LOL.) At least we knew we were in for a dazzling, emotionally draining treat, courtesy of a(n at least a) decade-old bottle of absinthe."
EW Gossip Girl recap, Sandra Gonzalez, War of the Worlds
"Before leaving to attend to Serena's ass his class, Colin issued a warning to Juliet: Back off or get cut off. Not that he was paying for her to live in the lap of luxury. Sure, Columbia doesn't come cheap, but wouldn't billionaire cousin at least give her some money to buy clothes that she didn't have to return? Sorry, I forgot this show is best watched with an absence of reason and logic. (That's not a complaint…)"
"Meanwhile, Serena and Colin's well-calculated cab rendezvous (still with no sex) turned into a conversation about a possible weekend away from the city together so they could get to know each other like a normal couple. Serena loved the idea, telling Colin, "I'm packing in my head already." Ah! So that's what fills that space…"
"At the loft, another arrangement was in the process of being made: one between Nate and Vanessa, both of whom had feelings of ill will toward Juliet. They wanted vengeance, so Nate proposed an alliance. He would distract Juliet if Vanessa went to Juliet's real apartment to look for information they could use. The decision was easy for Vanessa: "Let me see, writing a paper on Hannah Arendt or a secret mission that might help me clear my name? Let me grab my bag." (I'm a little shocked she didn't also bring along her broom and her cauldron.)"
EW Grey's Anatomy recap, Jennifer Armstrong, Heat Under Pressure
"Now, everything was coming to a head: Stark stole Alex’s idea to use a ping-pong ball to fix the liver problem (I’m dumbfounded that it would be okay to have a ping-pong ball lodged in your abdomen, but I’ll go with it), but April made sure the Chief knew it was Alex’s. The pancreas patient started to crash, and Bailey was busy, so she told Avery to “open her up.” And Derek, Meredith, Owen, and Teddy were squabbling over whether to give Cristina a talking-to that night — while, yes, they were performing simultaneous brain and heart surgeries that could determine the fate of the Middle East. I hope Cristina appreciated that."
EW Grey's Anatomy recap, Jennifer Armstrong, A Million Dollars, Baby
"At any rate, we, along with the eager doctors, were led to believe that one department would get this supposed million dollars. This meant the attendings would be spending their day proposing grand plans to the Chief, and the residents would be the attendings. In other words, it was not exactly the day you wanted to check into Seattle Grace. Here's something you don’t want to hear from the Chief of the hospital you are checking into: “Pray, people. We want God in the building today.” You also don’t want to come in with massive headaches due to a build-up of fluid in your skull that will require a shunt, only to be told by Dr. Derek Shepherd that you shouldn’t sweat the residents doing your surgery because, hey, “At some point we have to let them operate. That’s how we make new surgeons."
"Owen asked for disaster training. “We failed Charles Percy, one of our own doctors. I can’t face that.” I would love it if they ended up with some Charles Percy Memorial something — just to immortalize that poor, useless character forever. I feel like his name has come up more since he died than it did in the season he was on the show."
"Mark proposed a cosmetic medicine center and a burn unit, mainly because, um, he’s horny? “I’m not seeing anyone right now,” he told the Chief. “I’m not sleeping with nurses. So I’m an untapped source of raw power.” Only at this hospital is this a valid funding argument."
I had so much fun re-reading the recaps trying to fish out the hugely hilarious bits and I hope you guys have as much fun as I did!
Monday, November 1, 2010
being a hero has its price
Those were the last words uttered by Cristina Yang on the latest episode of Grey's Anatomy just before it ended. And it really struck a chord in me and I was inspired by that sentence to do some writing. On being a hero. Figuratively. I mean, I don't have any supernatural powers and frankly, I'm not that magnanimous enough to help every random stranger I come across.
There's something to be said about being a hero. What does the word 'hero' mean to you? What's the definition of 'hero'? A being of justice with supernatural powers who tries to help everyone, right every wrong and continuously save the world from the forces of evil until he/she can't anymore? Right. No, obviously not. Who are the heroes in reality? Gandhi... Mother Teresa... and I can't think of anyone else. Really selfless people who devoted their lives to the progress of society.
But is it really all that gratifying as people make it out to be? The concept of a hero... is it just the people's need to believe in miracles? In the face of all the crappiness and misery, to know that there is one person in the midst of it all who can still accomplish things. I think that's where the concept of a hero was born. The people need... no, they want to believe that there are miracles. A "hero" is just the manifestation of that desire.
However, at what point do we draw the line? When do we say that it's enough, and we stop? I mean we can't go on forever helping other people. What about us? When we need help, who's there? Perhaps many of you find yourselves alone. Like me. We spend our time helping people get through their crap because either we want to, or we like to but there's no one who can help us get through ours. Because we are supposed to be the strong ones. We're supposed to have already gone through our crap. Or maybe, crap isn't supposed to happen to us.
I'm a good sponge. And a good friend. Not trying to blow my own horn, but I pride myself on the fact that I'm one of the rare few you can call a TRUE friend. People confide in me and I listen. I'm a good listener too. And I try to help them, well... maybe advise would be a better word. I know some of you are like, "What can you possibly advise people on when you're only 19?" Touche. BUT, and a big but for that matter, I have gone through things that not many 19 year-olds have which have helped to make me the person I've become. I know that I'm dark and twisty. Scary and damaged. Prince of darkness. Whatever.
But like what Derek told Meredith, "If there's a crisis, you don't freeze. You move forward. You get the rest of us to move forward. Because you've seen worse. You've survived worse, and you know we'll survive too. You say you're all dark and twisty. It's not a flaw. It's a strength. It makes you who you are."
Those words spoke to me on some unconscious, emotional level because those of you who know me well, know that I've always identified myself with the titular character of Grey's Anatomy. And I like to think that the things I've gone through, gives me the experience and the ability to help my peers move forward through their crisis. Yeah, sometimes I'm at a loss for words. Sometimes I don't know what to say. But I'm not perfect. No one is. And I digress. But my point, and I do have one, is that sometimes... being a hero is too freaking exhausting. And lonely.
I really want to help my friends. I do. It's like I have a weird, creepy passion for it or something. But sometimes, I just wanna say "Stop!" and take a breather. Sometimes it's just too much to handle. I mean, if we want to help others, we can't let our own personal crap get in the way. So we put on a facade and pretend everything's fine. But it's not. And sometimes, wearing the mask gets too tiring and I would like to remove it.
And like I mentioned before, I find that in times of trouble, more than once for that matter, I have no one to turn to. I feel the need to do some talking, and I switch on my phone, go to "Contacts" and what do you know? I have no number to dial. Not because I have no friends but because either they can't understand what I'm going through or I don't know them well enough to start vomiting out my problems.
I've been looking for a Cristina. Someone who can understand what I'm going through and will always be there for me. As a friend. I'm looking for a soulmate who's a friend. If that even makes sense. Anyway, I thought I found one, but I was wrong. And I've been looking, but there's no one. I mean they don't call it soulmates if you can find it so easily, right? And I need someone urgently because sometimes I just feel these rush of emotions and I just wanna talk to someone before I end up screaming into my pillow like a crazy, deranged, neurotic person.
So yes... being a hero has its price. We try to be there for everyone, and string ourselves out in the process, but we find that when we fall... there's no one to catch us. Because we're supposed to be the "heroes". We're infallible. We're invulnerable. We have no weakness. And that's not true. Because as much as we're heroes, we're humans too. We're just as lost, and damaged and screwed up as everyone else.
There's something to be said about being a hero. What does the word 'hero' mean to you? What's the definition of 'hero'? A being of justice with supernatural powers who tries to help everyone, right every wrong and continuously save the world from the forces of evil until he/she can't anymore? Right. No, obviously not. Who are the heroes in reality? Gandhi... Mother Teresa... and I can't think of anyone else. Really selfless people who devoted their lives to the progress of society.
But is it really all that gratifying as people make it out to be? The concept of a hero... is it just the people's need to believe in miracles? In the face of all the crappiness and misery, to know that there is one person in the midst of it all who can still accomplish things. I think that's where the concept of a hero was born. The people need... no, they want to believe that there are miracles. A "hero" is just the manifestation of that desire.
However, at what point do we draw the line? When do we say that it's enough, and we stop? I mean we can't go on forever helping other people. What about us? When we need help, who's there? Perhaps many of you find yourselves alone. Like me. We spend our time helping people get through their crap because either we want to, or we like to but there's no one who can help us get through ours. Because we are supposed to be the strong ones. We're supposed to have already gone through our crap. Or maybe, crap isn't supposed to happen to us.
I'm a good sponge. And a good friend. Not trying to blow my own horn, but I pride myself on the fact that I'm one of the rare few you can call a TRUE friend. People confide in me and I listen. I'm a good listener too. And I try to help them, well... maybe advise would be a better word. I know some of you are like, "What can you possibly advise people on when you're only 19?" Touche. BUT, and a big but for that matter, I have gone through things that not many 19 year-olds have which have helped to make me the person I've become. I know that I'm dark and twisty. Scary and damaged. Prince of darkness. Whatever.
But like what Derek told Meredith, "If there's a crisis, you don't freeze. You move forward. You get the rest of us to move forward. Because you've seen worse. You've survived worse, and you know we'll survive too. You say you're all dark and twisty. It's not a flaw. It's a strength. It makes you who you are."
Those words spoke to me on some unconscious, emotional level because those of you who know me well, know that I've always identified myself with the titular character of Grey's Anatomy. And I like to think that the things I've gone through, gives me the experience and the ability to help my peers move forward through their crisis. Yeah, sometimes I'm at a loss for words. Sometimes I don't know what to say. But I'm not perfect. No one is. And I digress. But my point, and I do have one, is that sometimes... being a hero is too freaking exhausting. And lonely.
I really want to help my friends. I do. It's like I have a weird, creepy passion for it or something. But sometimes, I just wanna say "Stop!" and take a breather. Sometimes it's just too much to handle. I mean, if we want to help others, we can't let our own personal crap get in the way. So we put on a facade and pretend everything's fine. But it's not. And sometimes, wearing the mask gets too tiring and I would like to remove it.
And like I mentioned before, I find that in times of trouble, more than once for that matter, I have no one to turn to. I feel the need to do some talking, and I switch on my phone, go to "Contacts" and what do you know? I have no number to dial. Not because I have no friends but because either they can't understand what I'm going through or I don't know them well enough to start vomiting out my problems.
I've been looking for a Cristina. Someone who can understand what I'm going through and will always be there for me. As a friend. I'm looking for a soulmate who's a friend. If that even makes sense. Anyway, I thought I found one, but I was wrong. And I've been looking, but there's no one. I mean they don't call it soulmates if you can find it so easily, right? And I need someone urgently because sometimes I just feel these rush of emotions and I just wanna talk to someone before I end up screaming into my pillow like a crazy, deranged, neurotic person.
So yes... being a hero has its price. We try to be there for everyone, and string ourselves out in the process, but we find that when we fall... there's no one to catch us. Because we're supposed to be the "heroes". We're infallible. We're invulnerable. We have no weakness. And that's not true. Because as much as we're heroes, we're humans too. We're just as lost, and damaged and screwed up as everyone else.
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