the calm before the storm

So earlier on I tweeted something about a change coming. How a life altering change is nearing and I can feel it. How I hope it would come faster. Well... I only have one thing to say. Two things, actually. Firstly, I was so wrong because the change I was expecting wasn't the change that came. Secondly, be careful what you wish for.

Something happened today. Something huge... something major... a life changing something. I can't talk about it here because it's not something I want to share with the entire world or anyone who has access to the Internet. But I need an outlet because now I'm nervous and my feelings are just all over the place. I don't think most people can help me with what I'm about to go through. I don't know how I'll be affected but I know it'll definitely be bad and it's going to be probably the most trying experience of my life.

I believe everything happens for a reason. And maybe there's a silver lining behind possibly the darkest cloud of my life. But I cannot imagine what good can come out of it because I know definitely for a fact, I'm not going to come out of this unscathed. It's going to affect me and I know it's not going to be good. With all these tribulations I'm going to face, how do you expect me to always look out for the freaking silver lining?

And seriously, it's not a minor issue I'm talking about here. It's really a major issue, one that has shaken us to our core. It's something that even I, for once, don't know how to handle, expect or face. I don't know what to expect, hell, I don't even know what's going to come. I don't know. And I don't know how to face something that's coming when I don't even know what's coming. And I think that's probably what scares me the most.